Here's a paintin', I painted it with paint. The paint that I used was paint.

Look at him, a nomad, nothing but his boots and his shadow. woah. deep. Like a modern day Picasso ova' 'ere.

oh this place only has one star, forget it.

Just click it, it'll be bigger.

Well the races are over and it looks like Mike is the winner with his metal design.

Rios don't be so hard on yourself it looks pretty extreme.

I don't know man. I think it looks good.

HUNKAWOODAMANIA

    Hey guess what is impossible, shit, and something i'm terrible at. Give up? Its woodcarving, its fucking wood carving. God damn this is so hard, why is it so hard, why cant I produce anything at all. Have you ever had a stupid idea, and you know its a terrible idea but do it anyway? If not, see below and youll see what I mean.

Theme: No Holds Barred
Medium: Wood-carving
Results: Shit

Originally I wanted to carve Bret the Hitman Hart's Sharpshooter but I don't know how I could think that was a realistic outcome. Instead, I carved up a table slam and a tiny wrestling ring. I feel the need to apologize after every post I make especially when they are cop-outs like this. So, sorry.














Whittling, I don't know how old guys in rocking chairs do it. I'll blame the theme because it was just too extreme for a first try. Also, holy shit, so much junk is made from carving down.

 

    Alright boys, my challenge is pretty straightforward, you both have to build a race car and a launcher for that car. I gave you each about 3 feet of track to mess around with, your car has to fit and drive on that track. There will be two races, the first one is pinewood derby style, it'll just be a simple slope down, all your car can use is gravity. The second one will be a straightaway, this one measures your launcher, and how your car can handle the launcher's force.
    As for rules, there aren't too many. You can make the car out of whatever you want, and the launcher as well, also feel free to decorate your car, although I know you fucks wont. Winner will be measured by whoever has the best time crossing the finish line, or whoever gets the furthest in the track, the straight track will be about 15 feet total, so there is a chance the cars wont finish. If your car flies off the track for any reason, you get one redo, if it flies off again that counts as your furthest point in the track for that race. In the event of a tie, ill have a bonus track prepped, not 100% sure what its gonna be, but it'll prob have a sick loop in it. You have two months from today so posts are due April 15th, let me know if you have any other questions, and fuck you, you can't do that.  

i dont know how to do this

So glad I made this.

I failed to deliver.

Enjoy my sleep deprived fever comic.

You did this to me. You did this to us.

 

    Alright here is this stupid video that Mike made about the redemption challenge. I hate watching myself god dammit I'm such a shit. Anyway so you have 2 weeks from now, so the 3rd, to make a 24 panel comic. If you do a splash page, that counts as 4 panels, make it about whatever you want, no rules except the length. Try to have fun with it, also fuck you Mike.

Oh hey guys whats up, want to see this awful thing I made? So like any true American, when I hear the words home improvement, I of course think of Al Borland and Tim "The Toolman" Taylor. So I decided to make a shitty sculpture in Al's honor. Below is my model that I totally followed

So since I figured no matter what I did, it was going to be terrible anyway, I may as well experiment. Following that thought, I decided to use a program called Sculptris, which is a digital sculpting program. So when you fire this bad boy up, all you start with is a little ball of clay, which you can pinch, smooth, inflate and pull.

 Cool all done, now time to paint. Looking awesome. Don't worry, color will bring this even more together.

Oh hey labs, this is an on time garbage post brought to you by Binford tools.

If I was a sculptor, but then again no, I would have made a good sculpture in the theme of Home Improvement. Instead you get this thing.
I decided to use Sculpey, which is an easily obtainable and usable polymer clay that cures in the oven.

My idea was to sculpt a hammer out of sculpey, and then cure it, and then cover it with plaid in the style of Al Borland, the real toolman from Home Improvement.


Sculpey works best when it is uniform thickness and relatively thin, so the manufacturers suggest creating a core to model off of. I used aluminum foil and modeled the body of the hammer.






I kneaded and rolled out the sculpey onto a flat surface using a wine bottle (class folks, class) and then wrapped my core with it.


Trim the edges to ensure you can wrap your hammerhead.




Cure that hammer in the oven, follow the instructions on the packet, 15 minutes at 250 degrees for every quarter inch of sculpey. I did 20 minutes total, flipped the hammer 10 minutes in.


I took a small piece of scrap wood for the base, and took the cloth from a scrap shirt that I don't wear anymore. (Tips: Make sure you use a wood smaller than your torso for sizing purposes)


So Michaels suggested that school glue be used in pretty much every project, so I said Yeah sure Michaels worker, you are totally not 16 and don't give a shit about me or anything in the world, I'll use this runny bullshit on everything, thanks so much, no I don't want to frame anything. So I made a giant toaster strudel of glue and wood, take that Michaels.


Why am I even writing the steps here? You aren't going to do this at home. Why would you, this is a dumb idea. Look at the pictures, you're smart, just wing it like I did, and hope it doesn't look like shit, like mine does (Spoilers, it looks like shit)








Look at this little hammer, he's so cute. How did it turn into the final product that looks so bad? Answer: school glue.




School glue makes everything sticky especially your hands, but especially everything. So when you go to move stuff around it's going to stick to your project and your hands, so it's a bad idea in general. I don't know. At least I finished this one on time.